There are Times...

There are times we wish that the clock would stop ticking, so that the most beautiful and wonderful things that are happening in our lives would remain as it is.

Love still remembers the day Pinky brought her home and how they built their friendship almost instantly. Everyday, without fail, Pinky will bring Love along to wherever she goes. They will have conversations throughout the whole time; from morning wishes till they bid each other good night. Love feels loved and appreciated, and more importantly, she feels that she could be herself when Pinky is around here; there is no need to pretend to be someone she is not, to fake her expressions et cetera. She is happy and feels lucky to have Pinky as her owner. They enjoyed each other's company and presence.

Whenever Love is upset, Pinky would stuff sweet little things into her compartments and spend time playing with her. Love's languages of love are quality time and gifts, so when those meets are met, Love feels satisfied and she is glad to have found an owner who could accept her as she is, with whom she could feel comfortable with.

Pinky has since graduated from high school, and has entered college. Time has changed, and Pinky no longer use Love as often as she did. Pinky is also very busy with her course assignments and exams. They hardly spend time together any more. Love is feeling neglected. Besides, Pinky has also made more new friends, and could not commit so much time for Love.

She missed those days when both Pinky and herself enjoyed those long hours together. She missed those days when Pinky would chat non stop with her. She missed those days when Pinky would surprise her with her presence and gifts. She missed those days...

Day by day, Pinky is getting busier and has not much time for Love. Promises became words instead of actions. Love feels neglected and expressed it to Pinky, but there is nothing much that Pinky could do due to her busyness.

Love is always waiting in the waiting room. Should she continue waiting or...

My Thoughts are Haywire

Perhaps there may be a time when we would have doubts in our lives. We may have doubts about ourselves. We may doubt about our loved ones. We may even doubt God.

Do I have doubts in my life? Of course I do. In fact, at this moment, I begin to have a lot of doubts in various aspects of my life.

The Bible says, "Do not worry about tomorrow for tomorrow will worry about itself". It also says, "Cast all our anxieties to the Lord because He cares for us". The Bible even said that "And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered".

Whoa, God is truly amazing, Amen!

However, being human, we are still weak. We tend to take control of things that we cannot control. We want to do things or to make decisions that we think are good for ourselves. Yet, we have forgotten that all these efforts are unnecessary because we have a great God who will take care of everything for us.

Thoughts are haywire, feelings are confuse, but God is as clear as ever. Oh Lord, I pray that the cobwebs in my heart and my mind will be cleared as soon as possible because I do not want to be tortured by these any longer...

How a Man Loves a Woman

by Ben Stuart

“How do I love my wife well?” Young husbands frequently ask me this question, and it is a great one to ask. They are often faced with a laundry list of good tips: prioritize date nights, lead family prayer times, organize evening devotionals, take walks together, buy her flowers, write poetry, help around the house, etc.

I have found that these lists can be extremely helpful examples or extremely tyrannizing laws. If you anxiously try to accomplish them all, the stress could steal the joy of your marriage.

So what do we do? Is there one guiding principal that can help us navigate marriage well? I believe so. I believe we see it clearly in Genesis.

God Initiates

Genesis 1:2 presents a problem: “Now the earth was formless and void…” “Formless” means quite literally that it lacked form; it had no structure. “Void” means that it had no content. It was not full of anything. No form, no fullness. No structure, no content. Then God initiates. He spends the first three days of creation building structure: first air, then sea, then land. He fashions the static life-support systems necessary to sustain life.

Then in the following three days he fills these structures with content. He fills the air with birds, the sea with sea creatures, then the land with animals.

God sees formlessness and void and responds by bringing form and fullness. He creates order, but not stuffy, stifling order. It is order specifically designed to maximize the flourishing of life! This is our God. He brings structure, then content; form, then fullness; order, and then flourishing.

Foundations for Flourishing

You see a similar rhythm play out in Genesis 2. God places the man in the garden. Though the garden is truly a “delight,” it is not yet all that it could be. Thus God commands the man to “cultivate the land and keep it.” God charges the man to take the raw materials he has been given and structure the environment in such a way that promotes the flourishing of all the living things under his care. This is the role of man in the image of God!

Men are meant to create structures so that life can flourish. We create farms where the conditions can be perfectly calibrated to maximize the fruitfulness of the trees. We create ranches where animals can grow strong. We create financial structures where investments can reach their full potential. And, in the home, we create an environment where our wives and children can flourish in every area under God.

This is the mindset we are meant to take into our marriage: “How do I structure our family life so that everyone can flourish?” Certain constants will be present in every Christian home: study of the Bible, prayer, time together, time apart, etc. And yet we have the freedom to organize these constants in a way that best suit our particular spouses and children.

Crucial Questions to Ask

Therefore as husbands we wake up every day and ask ourselves, “How can I best organize the time, energy, money, and relationships that the Lord has given me to allow my wife to best flourish as a woman under God? Regarding time, have I given her enough time alone, away from the kids, to meet with God devotionally? How much time does she need? How will I create that space?

Have I given her enough time to meet with other women for support and encouragement? Have I given her enough time with me? With regard to our money, have I allocated it in the best way in order to fund those things that stir her affections for the Lord? How can I make that happen? What best helps her rest well? Vacation? Hobbies? Books?

For some of you the greatest gift you can give your wife is a night to get dressed up and hit the town. Others of you could go for a cheaper date night and use those funds to buy some lumber so she can build a picnic table (don’t laugh, that’s where my wife comes alive!).

With this approach, we are not tyrannized by a list of things we are supposed to be doing, but rather we are liberated to be excellent students of our wives. We are free to consider how we can use the resources God has given us to best love them.

Just Like Jesus

In many ways that is what Jesus did for us. He gave His life in order to create an environment where we can flourish under God. What do we need to be fully alive in God? The word of God? He came and preached it. The removal of our sin? He took it away on the cross. The indwelling power of the Spirit of God? He released the Spirit into us! A community of brothers and sisters? He created the Church.

Jesus Christ gave all in order to create the ideal circumstances for us to flourish as children of God. We husbands are called to love our wives the same way. We give of our resources so that they can be all they were meant to be as the daughters of God. This pleases him and blesses them.