Months After...

Pinky has left for 200 odd days now. LOVE misses her very much.

Throwback to 239 days ago, Pinky brought LOVE out. LOVE remembered how Pinky disappointed her and was so afraid that Pinky would not keep her promise again this time round but was grateful when Pinky went to the baggies and told LOVE that "I will bring you out today"

Pinky and LOVE spent few hours together; LOVE was happy but happy moments usually do not last because that was also the last time Pinky and LOVE spend together before Pinky leave to overseas.

When Pinky arrived at overseas, she often would call home to ask about her bags. As time went by, Pinky quieted down, LOVE had no idea what happened to Pinky.

Is she okay?

Is she healthy?

Is the weather there good? Can she adapt to the weather?

How is her new life?

Have she made new friends (and forgotten the old ones)?

Have she been spending too much time with Baby that her heart had no space for LOVE anymore?

Tick tock, tick tock...

Pinky and LOVE hardly communicate anymore.

LOVE is devastated.

Today, LOVE found out about something which Pinky did and it affected LOVE badly.

LOVE cried...

It Could be the Last

As days pass, while you are counting down your days to travel to overseas for your studies, maybe excitedly; I am counting down too, just sadly.

It could be the last time we celebrate our annniversary;

It could be the last time we celebrate thanksgiving together;

It could be the last time we celebrate Christmas;

It could be the last time we celebrate New Year;

It could be the last time we celebrate my birthday;

It could be the last time we celebrate Chinese New Year;

It could be the last time we celebrate Valentine's;

It could be the last time for many things...

That aside, perhaps it is only me who wanted to celebrate all of the above together with you. Elephy said it takes two to clap, I am not sure what it means, but I think it would mean that you must have the same desire too.

You did not visit baggies the past few weeks and I miss you. I wonder what are you doing outside. Are you busy making preparations for your trip? After all, surely there would be much to prepare. I suppose you are stressed out because you need to complete a lot of things before you move away from home.

I have been quiet too, going through all the emotions inside me. I have mixed feelings, but then again, what can I do? It is a fact and truth that you will be away for a period of time. This will not change. On the contrary, my relationship with you will change.

Elephy also said, the more one spends time together with the other, the more attached they are. Sigh, we have not been spending time together lately, does it mean that you are less attached to me?

Does it even matter for me to care so much, because I do not feel that you care as much as I do. It is a restless wait. I am tired, physically and emotionally.

Perhaps, humans are like that. They are different from us. We are bags, and we just have one owner, so we are emotionally attached to our owner; whereas our owner is different, Pinky has  friends, relatives, gadgets, and of course, many other bags.

Would we have the opportunity to spend time together, at least once, before you move away? Again, does it matter? After all, while I am expressing myself at this moment, I am already buried deep inside the box, and to take me out, would be a tedious task as Pinky has to remove all other boxes above me.

Sigh...Sigh...Sigh...

Perhaps, we would not even have our last...

A Letter to Pinky [I]

Dear Pinky,

Hope this finds you well.

You will be entering university soon and will be going overseas to continue your studies. I know that you would leave me behind, as you cannot bring too many things over, it will just add weight to your luggage. It is sad to know that you will leave me behind, especially after what we had been through.

A few years later when you come back, would you still remember me? Once, I was your favourite bag, but sooner or later, I will be buried deep inside your big pile of bags. What would happen to me? The thought of it scares me. I hate to be buried, hate to be forgotten, hate to be kept inside a so-called special box, forever.

Do you remember your promise to me? That you would keep me in your heart forever, that you would take care of me forever, that you would want me, that I am important to you, that I matter to you, that if one day you decided to throw me away, you would do it gently and tell me face to face.

I know each time you enter the baggies I will keep bugging you to bring me out, to spend time with me, to hold me; maybe I have been too pushy, hence you felt irritated and annoyed. Pinky, do you know how it feels to miss yet cannot do anything about it? Do you know how sad it is to miss and not to be missed in return?

Months ago, I had dreams that you pushed me away, and now it seemed that the dream has come true. You no longer call for me when you enter baggies, you are busy with Baby and always spend time with her. You know how it feels to be left behind? I overheard that you are bringing Baby along and yet time is always spent with her. Pinky, Elephy told me that for humans, if they know that they would not be around for a long period of time, they would want to spend more time with their loved ones while they are still around. Am I not in your list of loved ones?

I felt used. I felt neglected. I felt that you are just playing around with me. When you first bought me, it was just a temporary excitement and now that you have fully used me, you have known me inside out, you do not want me anymore. Do you know how that feels?

You ignore me, you avoid me, you neglect me, as though I am invisible; yet Pinky, I want to let you know that all I want is just a proper conversation between us, to sort things out. I do not blame you and I forgive you, I just want a proper goodbye. 

A bag is subject to fair wear and tear, when I do not serve my purpose anymore, where would I be in your heart?

Wish you all the best in your future.

Huggies,

LOVE ~

The Roller Coaster Ride

Have you ever been on a roller coaster ride?

It would start slow, preparing our hearts and then slowly and eventually it would pick up on its speed, the ride was getting more exciting when the roller coaster turned upside down at a high speed and before you knew what was going on, the ride began to slow down and all of sudden the speed caught up again and what a sight of relief when you finally saw familiar faces at the place where you began the ride...

Falling in love perhaps is like that too...

In the beginning when you try to get to know a person, things started slowly and naturally; and a funny feeling inside our hearts telling us that we like the person. Then we try to find out if they feel the same too. There are butterflies in our stomach. We are anxious and excited at the same time.

Then things began to progress smoothly. The feeling is just like a roller coaster ride; at least that is what LOVE is experiencing.

Every roller coaster ride would need to come to an end. When would hers be?

LOVE loves it when Pinky brings her out but each time she is afraid that that would be the last time Pinky would bring her out. What can LOVE do?

Maybe, it is time for LOVE to wake up from her fantasy...

Sometimes, she wished that Pinky would assure her and say "Silly LOVE, how could you think like that?"

IF, and that is a big if...

IF, and that is a big if....

one could turn back the time, LOVE wished Pinky did not notice and buy her in the first place.

Perhaps...

things would turn out to be better...both LOVE and Pinky would continue to live their own lives...

OR

IF, and that is a big if...

Pinky noticed LOVE earlier, would things turn out to be better?

Maybe, and only maybe...

Pinky would pay more attention on LOVE...

LOVE's language of love is Quality Time...

Would Pinky spend more time with LOVE?

IF, and that is a big if...

A Little Too Hopeful

LOVE is on happy mode because Pinky had promised her that she would spend some time with her on their anniversary date!! Anniversary date meaning the day Pinky bought LOVE at the market. The day LOVE felt loved. The day LOVE felt wanted. The day LOVE felt that she would no longer be alone.

Looking forward to that day, LOVE started to prepare herself mentally and emotionally.

The day before their anniversary LOVE confirmed with Pinky and Yahoo! Pinky confirmed that she is going to bring LOVE out to celebrate :D

The day before the anniversary too LOVE was not in good mood. The other bags in the room bullied her and gave her negative feedback; that Pinky would stood her up, that Pinky would bring Baby out and forget about LOVE. LOVE tried not to think negatively and continued to be hopeful until...

On the morning of their anniversary, LOVE woke up happily and started to think where to celebrate the anniversary with Pinky but her heart almost stopped when she saw a note on her pillow:

"LOVE, tonight I can't bring you out. Work came up"

LOVE's mood was at the peak when she woke up but dropped as fast as this Space Shot Ride, almost getting a heart attack!

She lost appetite, she did not feel like doing anything, she cried so much that her eyes were swollen, in short, she was so down, so disappointed :(

Pinky did not apologise, nor did she offer to make up for another day; she just told LOVE that LOVE is important.

LOVE felt clueless ... devastated ... confused ... disappointed ... sad ... hurt ... pain ... heart being pinched .... not respected ... neglected ... ignored ... avoided ... betrayed ... unimportant ... unappreciated ... et cetera

A little too hopeful, with much disappointments...

Pinky....did she hear LOVE's cry?

Funny thing is, LOVE is the one who is upset but at the same time worrying about Pinky instead of the other way round ~

When You Want to Give Up...

Remember Why You Started...

LOVE was anxious over the dream that she had. She had been dreaming similar dreams for the past few days and that made her worried even more. She stayed quiet in the room, cried herself to sleep at night, hoping that the other bags would not be able to hear her cry. One thing she could not really hide was her lost of appetite, the other bags could notice that she had lost much appetite lately.

On the verge of deciding whether she should continue holding on, she found this. Then she was reminded of the beautiful memories she had with Pinky. LOVE had actually planned to run away but when she saw this poster one day, she had decided that she would not give up because she had promises to fulfill, she was reminded how Pinky gave her strength, support and encouragement, and would love to walk the journey together with Pinky.

Would Pinky be willing to walk with her? The question lingered on her mind and hopefully Pinky would give her an affirmative response.

The Dream

LOVE was sleeping when suddenly she was awake by a dream which kept her worried for days:

Pinky brought her out and all of sudden asked LOVE to go away.

LOVE was trying to pull Pinky gently but was pushed away.

Then LOVE woke up, feeling insecure...

Would this happen?

It's Holiday!

Holiday! Holiday! All the bags in the room are excited about the coming holiday! :)

Pinky went into the room and look around. "Hmm, which bag should I bring along? Ah, Baby!!!"

So Pinky took Baby and went out from the room.

LOVE, sat at the corner, felt sad that she was not chosen. She hid in a corner to cry.

The other bags could hear her sobbed and went to her to comfort her.

Elephy: "LOVE, why are you crying? Don't be sad, you still have us :)"

Colourful: "Yes, let's hope one day Pinky will sell all of us to a better owner, one who would appreciate and treat us as their precious"

Blackie: "Yeah, no big deal LOVE, take a look at me! I am used for special occasion only and I am proud of that!!"

LOVE: "Oh, you would never know and understand my feelings. I am deeply attached to Pinky. She is my first owner. Previously nobody would even take a second look at me but Pinky discovered me! The encounters I had with Pinky were so memorable. She hugged me when she was  cold in the train, protect me when she was walking on the street, kissed me whenever she got a good result, saying that I brought her blessing, and she would never put me on the floor, and oh...there were just too many sweet memories that we shared together"...*sobbing*

Reddie: "LOVE, you are special and I am sure you deserve a better owner. In fact, all of us here deserve a better owner"

The others agreed in unison...

LOVE, felt loved and comforted by her companions but deep inside she knows that she longs for Pinky. Day by day, she waited for Pinky to be back from holiday and one day...

Pinky: "I'm back baggies!! and I had a great time! Baby had been so lovely and I love her so much! We had so much fun together!! Thank you Baby" (Pinky kept Baby nicely in her special case)

Before she walked out from the door....

Pinky: "and oh, I miss you LOVE..."

LOVE: ...

There are Times...

There are times we wish that the clock would stop ticking, so that the most beautiful and wonderful things that are happening in our lives would remain as it is.

Love still remembers the day Pinky brought her home and how they built their friendship almost instantly. Everyday, without fail, Pinky will bring Love along to wherever she goes. They will have conversations throughout the whole time; from morning wishes till they bid each other good night. Love feels loved and appreciated, and more importantly, she feels that she could be herself when Pinky is around here; there is no need to pretend to be someone she is not, to fake her expressions et cetera. She is happy and feels lucky to have Pinky as her owner. They enjoyed each other's company and presence.

Whenever Love is upset, Pinky would stuff sweet little things into her compartments and spend time playing with her. Love's languages of love are quality time and gifts, so when those meets are met, Love feels satisfied and she is glad to have found an owner who could accept her as she is, with whom she could feel comfortable with.

Pinky has since graduated from high school, and has entered college. Time has changed, and Pinky no longer use Love as often as she did. Pinky is also very busy with her course assignments and exams. They hardly spend time together any more. Love is feeling neglected. Besides, Pinky has also made more new friends, and could not commit so much time for Love.

She missed those days when both Pinky and herself enjoyed those long hours together. She missed those days when Pinky would chat non stop with her. She missed those days when Pinky would surprise her with her presence and gifts. She missed those days...

Day by day, Pinky is getting busier and has not much time for Love. Promises became words instead of actions. Love feels neglected and expressed it to Pinky, but there is nothing much that Pinky could do due to her busyness.

Love is always waiting in the waiting room. Should she continue waiting or...

It Matters Who...

Today is the last day of the year. I thought of continuing with my "2013 in a Glance" series but as I was chatting with a friend of mine, asking her how is she going to celebrate New Year tonight, she said she does not have all these fancy celebrations and what matters is, with whom are we celebrating with.

This makes me ponder, "it matters with whom we celebrate with".

I never thought of going anywhere to celebrate tonight, not even church, as I need to move in to my new room tomorrow, so prefer to stay at home to rest and do some packing. Then I thought, if I were to have someone to celebrate with me, would I have a different plan? Perhaps so...

It is indeed true that it matters with whom we celebrate an occasion with. If we celebrate it with someone who is dear to us, the feeling must be awesome.

LOVE is in the "waiting room" and hoping that Pinky will come and bring her out on New Year's Eve but deep inside, she knows that Pinky will not do so. LOVE hopes that one day, she will no longer have the miserable feeling of waiting...

My Name is L.O.V.E

Hello everyone, you must be thinking that this post is about the topic of love? Not at all, because this is a story about ME, and my name is LOVE and I am a BAG!

My Creator had created me in the form of an elephant and I am waiting for my new owner to buy me at Chatuchak, Bangkok. Everyday I sit and wait for potential owners. Finally, one fine day, a lady dropped by and she took me up and say, "I think my niece would love this! Okay, I shall get this!"

Oh, let me tell you how excited I was. I was so happy that finally someone took notice of my existence. She took me back to Malaysia, washed me and then gave me as a gift to her niece. Oh, how I love my new owner!! Let's call her Pinky!

Pinky loves me very much and she names me LOVE (that is how I got my name). She loves to carry me around wherever she goes. I feel happy because I feel that I am very useful. Although sometimes I cannot perform well due to my limited size but Pinky never despises me, she still loves me for who and what I am. 

One day, whilst I was sleeping, the other bags woke me up. They told me about a story of Pinky's favourite bag, Baby. They told me that she had been carrying Baby for many years but because I am cute, she rarely uses Baby now but ultimately Pinky is going to put me aside and continue to use Baby because that is still her favourite bag.

I could not sleep well that night, because I feel upset by what was told to me. I have always wanted to find an owner who would appreciate me and accept me, and I thought I have found one, who is Pinky. I turned left and turned right, but I still could not sleep and in the end, I cried myself to sleep.

Baby is being kept in a special cupboard and I found out that Pinky would take her out to clean and hug her to sleep every night. When I found out about this, I felt neglected and my mood was badly affected by this; no longer I am the cheerful Love I once was :-(

One day Pinky came to her room of bags where I was kept and she took me up and say, "Love, I am sorry I have to keep you aside from now on, because I have reached another stage of my life and Baby is the only bag that could satisfy my needs. I love you and you have performed very well all this while, but I need a bag which I can use at all times. I am sorry, Love. I will take good care of you from time to time. Take care!"

Ouch, that hurts! I was very upset by what Pinky told me. I could not sleep every night and would wake up in the middle of the night to cry. I love Pinky and hope that I could serve her as long as I could. However, I know my own limits. I am just a cute bag suitable to be used during fun days, and am not a multi purpose bag which Pinky is seeking for.

Every now and then, I would wait patiently for Pinky to come into my (our) room and have a look at us. Whenever she wants a fun night out, she would take me out. I would be excited and ever ready to serve my owner. Each time she brings me out, she would say, "Thank you Love, I am very happy to bring you out today. Good night!".

There I am, waiting for my next round to serve my owner in the "Waiting Room". I could only miss Pinky and her voice and cry myself to sleep whenever I think about how happy I was whenever she brings me out.

Tick Tock, Tick Tock....

When is my turn?

Hot as the SUN, Cold as the ICE

A friend gave me an inspiration on this metaphor. Hmm, what does this stand for? What do you see here? It is up to your imagination :)